Two Rules

This is the first entry in a series of lessons that I wish to pass onto my son, Alexander. I also wish to share it with Nicola and Mark because they never heard me say these words…

This is my observation – I wish that someone had told me these two rules 30 years ago. Alexander, there are just two rules to living life well with others. Now this may seem simplistic, but it will make sense. The 10 Commandments, most biblical moral lessons, many laws and social rules can be boiled down to  just these two rules.

Rule 1 – Don’t hurt others.

Rule 2 – Try not to hurt yourself.

Whenever you get stuck in a dark tunnel, check these two rules to bring you to the light.

Two easy rules with one common challenge. You will need to think in every interaction with people if you are following the rules, in the order they are written. The greater challenge will be using your open mind to know what hurt is.

Lastly, the real trick is being able to identify when others are being hurt by you and when you are being hurt by other people. Every single time you are challenged in a relationship, with anyone, check to see if you are following these two rules; if you are, then you have done all that you can.

The greatest people who lived on this earth, from Gandhi to Mother Theresa, followed these two rules.

Half Full – Half Empty

How often have you heard that for someone the glass is half full – or half empty?

Perspective is a large portion of this equation. How you view yourself in relation to others and all that there is, will dictate the fullness of the glass.

Is your glass half full (or more)? Does what happens in life seem like it will work out, no matter what? Do you relish the experiences that you receive and the lessons learned?

Or is the glass half empty? Are you always longing for more? Are you thinking that life, circumstances, relationships, jobs all remain unfulfilled? Do you see what you have missed rather than what you have received?

The glass being half full is really about the perspective of life where you are grateful for all that you receive. You appreciate what you have – no matter what it is. Life seems to serve you what you need, when you need it – most of the time.

One ship sails East,
And another West,
By the self-same winds that blow,
‘Tis the set of the sails
And not the gales,
That tells the way we go.

Like the winds of the sea
Are the waves of time,
As we journey along through life,
‘Tis the set of the soul,
That determines the goal,
And not the calm or the strife.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox, 1916

Alexander, I know that you are a ‘glass is half full’ person. The only challenge you will really find in this area is relationships with others who are ‘glass is half empty’ people. Do not be swayed that a 1/2 full person is a blind optimist and the 1/2 empty is the grounded pessimist. It is not about being one or the other – it is not centered in the person at all. It is about how you look out, not how you look in.

For that, I offer this advice. The people who are the glass is half type are rarely able to see what they truly have, they cannot see what the gifts are and what joys there are – in nearly everything. Those people should be allowed to be – let them go, you cannot change them. It is not about changing perspectives for you or others – it is about accepting that they exist and then seeking a balance with someone who is closer.

Read about “Belief”; those people are the reason that we who are the 1/2 full glass succeed.

Work – the salt mine, slave pit, heaven or life university

Add up all the time you are an adult. Add up all those hours of life and living. 

Work is the relationship that you will be spending the most time with. From when you start proper at 21, until you finish at 65, you will have put in 91520 hours into work (based on 2080 hours per year). 

Creation of Adam - Sistine Chapel

Michelangelo spent 4 years in design, building the scaffold to do the work and ultimately painting over 300 figures on the interior ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. In some 12000 hours (they used to work more hours in a year) he left us with a fine piece of art from all that work. In the 90-100,000 hours you will work, make a good choice for what you will do as well – I do not expect paintings, I expect what I have always told you – I want you to be happy. 

You will spend more time with the people you work with than nearly any other person on this planet. Work is the ultimate relationship that you have little choice in who you have as a ‘mate’.  Beyond sleep and possibly any serious recreational activity, you will spend more hours of your life. at a job. working. 

So what does that make work – well – if you find the job you do, the place where you work or the people you work with unpleasant, you will find what 85% of the US population believes. The vast majority of people working do not enjoy what they do. Of the remaining 15%, those happy workers have found something “rare”. 

Make it worth your while to be in the top, enjoyable, 15% of workers. Here are some guidelines for you; 

• Find a job that teaches you new skills
• Work in a place where other people are also happy to be there
• Make sure the job is stimulating
• Know who you are so that you can know what to look for.
• Make enough money to pay for living and being alive
• Give everything you have to work as long as you are receiving what you need.

If things are not going well in a job, then give it your best – and then leave on good terms. 

That’s it. 

I have worked for many people and have; learned from, admired, found as friends / leaders / teammates, shared experiences, enjoyed life and had pleasurable sufferiengs from many people whom furthered my own personal character, skills, experiences and humanity. Read about relationships because what you will have left at the end of the day is those relationships. I have had some great work situations in my life.

Nice Money...

The extended subject of money.

The pleasure of work is not solely based on money. You will hear coworkers complain about how little they get paid or how much others get paid (it always seems to be one or the other). Ignore the subject of money as these others see it (often in coworker comparison) - focus only on how much money do you need to live and then to spend to further your life. Stay focused on this after you have found the place you wish to be, with the work you wish to do and the people you are working with. The real truth here is that sometimes, no matter what you get paid, no matter how much money – the job is not worth it – so that alone tells you that money is not the single controlling factor in maintaining any job.

I guess for me, being happy was always more important than being rich; and I did great on the first part and pretty good on the second.

David Walker – finder tool – keywords

I thought that I should have a blog for people who know me. If I am the wrong David Walker, it is your fault – you should have put in more keywords in the search! There are lots and lots of David Walker’s out there.

So, a bit about me that should help you confirm that you are in the right area…

To those I left behind in Canada:

I was born in Calgary, Alberta in 1962. I went to Richmond Elementary, Viscount Bennett and Bishop Grandin High School.

I attended one college and 2 universities. My first year was in Calgary at Mount Royal College. I then spent one year at the University of Alberta. My degree took me three and a half years total and was from Eastern Washington University. When all was said and done, I attended 4 years in a row, achieved 150+ credits (the best semester I had was 17 credits) and graduated with a BA with honors.

If you are looking for me from my long past, the education and birth place should be enough to bring you here.

For those I have worked with, the primary places were:

South Family YMCA, Alberta Forestry, Island Kayak Guides, West Beach Kayaks… and the latest place (which I love!), Go2marine.

Lastly, if you know my hobbies – life interests:

Cars and Trucks, Land Rovers, Kayaking, Outdoor Recreation, Sailing.

I cruised with two sailboats; a Piver Nimble named Godsend and an Ingrid 38 named Kalakala.

I thought that I would make it easy for those to find me who might wish to…